04/05/2026

MONDAY | MAY 4, 2026

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Couple thankful for ‘miracle family’ blessing

Ű BY IKHWAN ZULKAFLEE newsdesk@thesundaily.com

“ Alhamdulillah , their relationship is very good – like typical siblings, but with a very special bond,” said his mother Siti Shazwani Saadon. She said Amir Akhbar has shown maturity beyond his years, especially towards his younger sister Aira Khadijah Mohd Khairul Izhwan, aged three. “He is very loving and protective of Aira Khadijah. He gives in a lot and gently guides her. “Honestly, he is a very mature child, full of empathy. Sometimes, even we are surprised by how he understands the feelings of others,” she said. That emotional awareness extends to his relationship with his mother. “He is also very affectionate towards me, very expressive in showing love, and that same warmth is what he gives to his sister.” From an early age, he has also taken on small responsibilities at home. “In many situations, he is not just a brother, but like a little guide in our family.” Siti Shazwani said there is no distinction in how she loves her children. “There is no difference. “One I carried in my womb while the other I carried in my heart, whom I nursed myself.” She described both paths to motherhood PETALING JAYA: After a decade of marriage marked by heartbreak and four miscarriages, a 39-year-old civil servant found her path to motherhood redefined not by biology alone, but through faith, acceptance and an unwavering sense of responsibility. For Siti Shazwani Saadon and her husband Mohd Khairul Izhwan Mansor, the arrival of their adopted son Muhammad Amir Akhbar Abdul Matin was never a second choice or a temporary measure, but a calling embraced fully after years of quiet struggle. With the assistance of NGO OrphanCare, the couple were finally able to hold a child of their own – a moment that marked the true beginning of their journey into parenthood. “We had been trying to have a child for a long time and went through four miscarriages. At one point, we truly felt that perhaps we would never be blessed with a biological child,” she told theSun in an interview arranged with OrphanCare. Rather than allow despair to define them, the couple chose acceptance. “When we decided to adopt, we didn’t see it as a ‘second choice’. We accepted it completely,” she said. Siti Shazwani’s preparation for motherhood went beyond expectation. Before bringing Amir Akhbar home, she took it upon herself to induce lactation, determined to breastfeed him in line with Islamic principles on milk kinship. “I made it a responsibility to prepare myself – including trying to produce breast milk beforehand. Alhamdulillah , Allah made it easy, and I was able to nurse him,” she said. For her, it was not merely physical but deeply spiritual. “Since then, he is not just an adopted child. He is fully my son, including as my ‘milk child’. I did it for Allah , and to ensure that I uphold the rulings that He has set. This responsibility is very great for us.” She vividly recalls the moment she first held him. “When I first carried him, the feeling was overwhelming – not just love, but a deep sense of responsibility. After everything I had gone through to nurse him according to syariah , that moment felt incredibly

o Successful adoption of son after years of challenges heralds subsequent birth of

biological daughter

Siti Shazwani and Mohd Khairul with their children Amir Akhbar and Aira Khadijah. – PIC COURTERSY OF SITI SHAZWANI SAADON

arrangement. But for us, Amir Akhbar is not the cause of something else – he himself is a complete blessing.” More than that, she believes he transformed them. “He is the one who matured us, who taught us patience, love and the true meaning of being parents. “What began as years of waiting and loss has unfolded into a journey of faith, love and fulfilment, anchored by a child.”

meaningful,” she said. “There was no hesitation. There was never a thought of ‘he is not born from me, why should I care deeply?’ The only thought was: ‘Amir Akhbar is my child. Help me, God, to take care of him.’” Two years later, she discovered she was pregnant, something she once feared would never happen. “When I found out I was pregnant, we were very thankful. But at the same time, I

was more worried about Amir Akhbar. I kept thinking about his feelings and how he would cope with the changes.” But he adapted with unexpected maturity. “ Alhamdulillah , he accepted it very well. Even while his sibling was still in the womb, he was already showing love. He became more caring and attentive.” Looking back, she sees no coincidence in their journey. “We see everything as Allah ’s share his story so that he grows up feeling confident and valued.” Despite knowing his background, she said he has never felt anything lacking. Siti Shazwani said the hardest part of adoption is not raising a child, but what comes before. “The preparation, emotionally and physically, including the effort to produce breast milk requires sacrifice, persistence and strength.” But she said these struggles shaped them as parents. “We become more patient, more understanding and more appreciative of every trust that has been given to us.” She stressed the importance of understanding the emotional needs of adopted children. “We also need to understand the trauma that the children might have experienced and continuously help them gradually overcome it.” She added that patience and knowledge are essential. She also highlighted legal responsibilities. “In terms of documentation, everything must follow the proper channels. “OrphanCare assists with the initial stage, but the responsibility after that lies fully with the adoptive parents.” She urged couples not to fear adoption. “If your heart is truly ready, it can become a very beautiful journey.” – BY IKHWAN ZULKAFLEE

‘Our children know they are equally loved’ PETALING JAYA: At the age of five, Muhammad Amir Akhbar Abdul Matin understands he is adopted but that awareness has never affected the love within his family. as equally demanding. “Both required sacrifice and both are deeply meaningful to me. Love is not dependent on blood, but on the trust that Allah has given to us.” While largely supported, she

Break news on adoption gently, says academic

PETALING JAYA: Telling a child about his or her adoption should be handled early, gently and with careful timing to avoid emotional distress, said an expert. Universiti Teknologi Mara Faculty of Administrative Science and Policy Studies Assoc Prof Dr Azizan Zainuddin said disclosure must be gradual and never made to feel sudden or overwhelming, stressing the need for “wisdom, the right timing and gentle language”. She said one approach is to introduce the narrative in early childhood through positive storytelling, such as bedtime stories, so that adoption is treated as part of normal family life rather than something secretive or sensitive. As the child grows, parents should maintain openness and encourage questions in a safe environment, she said. “Give the children room to ask questions without fear, and respond honestly in a way that is appropriate to their age.” She added that reassurance must be consistent throughout. “The key message that must be repeated is that being adopted does not reduce the love they receive or their place within the family.” – BY IKHWAN ZULKAFLEE

acknowledged that misconceptions still exist. “Sometimes, there are certain assumptions in society, even if unintentional. But it is up to us to educate them. Because in situations like this, a person’s dignity is at stake.” They ensure both children grow up equally valued. “We raise our children in a loving environment so they know they are appreciated and loved equally.” She said openness is key to changing misconceptions. “We believe that openness and how we educate society are very important in changing misconceptions about adoption. “I have never felt affected by how people perceive this, because I see it as my responsibility to convey what is right. “ Allah does not judge our beginnings, but our endings. “Our duty is simply to fulfil the trust entrusted to us as best as we can.” On their son’s upbringing, she said honesty is handled carefully. “We believe in honesty that is appropriate to his age. Amir Akhbar knows that he came into our lives in a very special way and that he is deeply loved. “When the time comes, we will continue to