06/07/2025

ON SUNDAY JULY 6, 2025 VI theSunday Special

The myth of the big breakthrough Real transformation is rarely dramatic. Most of the time, it’s quiet, repetitive and disguised as ordinary life BY DR SRITHARAN VELLASAMY

Change doesn’t always come with a makeover montage. Sometimes, it’s just you – repeating the same action, day after day, even when you’re not sure it’s making a difference. Yet, it is. You’re building new patterns. Laying down new neural pathways. Teach your brain what “safe” looks like and who you’re becoming next. The writer James Clear, in Atomic Habits , says: “You do not rise to the level of your goals. You fall to the level of your systems.” In other words, your life doesn’t change just because you want it to. It changes because you’ve designed it to – with habits, environments and rhythms that support the version of yourself you’re working toward. Boring bits that build you Give yourself credit for the small things no one sees. The morning you got out of bed on time. The hour you logged off social media early. The time you apologised first, even though your ego resisted.

Design your environment to support your goals. When systems are in place, success becomes a by product.”

W E love a good break through story – the eureka moment in the shower, the one-night success, the dramatic final straw that made someone change their life, leave their job or pursue their dream. It makes for a satisfying narrative. Clean. Cinematic. Inspiring. But real breakthroughs? The ones that actually shape a person? They rarely look like that. Most of the time, they’re slow. Unevent ful. They happen in the background while you’re busy doing something else. You only notice them later, when your jeans fit differently, your anxiety in traffic fades or you realise you haven’t thought about that one person in weeks. It wasn’t one big leap. It was a hundred small steps. Quiet. Repeated. Uncel ebrated. Seductive lie of the lightning bolt The idea of the sudden transformation is powerful. It gives us hope that one defin ing moment will lift us out of whatever rut we’re in. But it also sets a dangerous expectation – if change doesn’t happen quickly, it won’t work. That if we don’t feel radically different, we’ve failed.

Every action you take is a vote for the person you wish to become.

In truth, most change is unremarkable in the moment. It doesn’t feel like growth. It feels like getting up early, even when you’re tired. Saying no to something that once drained you. Choosing to respond with calm instead of sarcasm. Not replying to that one person who keeps showing up only when they’re bored. It’s the daily decision to stay aligned with your values, even when no one’s applauding. Breakthroughs aren’t made of fire works. They’re made of friction – the small, deliberate actions that slowly shift your trajectory. In Malaysia, the pressure to achieve comes early. From UPSR to PT3 to SPM, we’re conditioned to chase milestones. Straight As. Scholarships. Ideal careers. Ideal partners. Even ideal timelines – get married by 30, buy property before 35, have kids by 40. When you’re raised on checkpoints, slow progress can feel like failure. But it isn’t.

Consistency over intensity: Regular, manageable habits often outperform sporadic, intense efforts.