16/11/2025

ON SUNDAY November 16, 2025 theSunday Special XII

The joy of not knowing Why not having the answers might be your greatest strength

We pretend to know what

others are talking about. We Google frantically under the table.”

BY SIMON VELLA

T HERE’S a strange pressure these days to have everything ¿JXUHG RXW N RW MXVW \RXU FDUHHU ¿QDQFHV and five-year plan – but also your personality, politics, parenting style, skincare routine and your opinion on everything from oat milk to the world’s FRQÀLFWV W H¶UH H[SHFWHG WR KDYH FODULW\ &HU WDLQW\ $ WDNH $ IUDPHZRUN 3UHIHUDEO\ LQ FKDUDFWHUV RU IHZHU %XW ZKDW LI DQG hear me out, you just don’t know? What if you’re still learning, still listening, still confused? What if the best thing you can do is pause the performance … and let the question hang? We’re taught that not knowing is weak From school onwards, we’re taught that DQVZHUV HTXDO LQWHOOLJHQFH 5DLVH \RXU KDQG )LOO LQ WKH EODQN 6KRZ \RXU ZRUNLQJ $ dmitting uncertainty was often pun ished – a sign of laziness, inattention or ODFN RI H̆ RUW 6R DV DGXOWV ZH FDUU\ WKDW UHÀH[ :H EOX̆ :H JXHVV :H SUHWHQG WR NQRZ ZKDW RWKHUV DUH WDONLQJ DERXW :H *RRJOH RU XVH &KDW*37 IUDQWLFDOO\ XQGHU WKH WDEOH :H¶UH DOOHUJLF WR VD\LQJ ³,¶P QRW VXUH ´ % ut there’s quiet wisdom in not know LQJ Especially now, when everyone VHHPV VXUH RI HYHU\WKLQJ DOO WKH WLPH ,Q Malaysian social spaces, from kopitiams WR :KDWV$SS IDPLO\ JURXSV WKHUH¶V QR VKRUWDJH RI FRQ¿GHQW RSLQLRQV ± RQ JRY ernment, neighbours, climate change, FKLFNHQ SULFHV DQG MXVW DERXW HYHU\WKLQJ %XW VFUDWFK EHQHDWK WKH VXUIDFH DQG \RX¶OO RIWHQ ¿QG SHRSOH UHJXUJLWDWLQJ KHDGOLQHV PHPHV RU XQYHUL¿HG QHZV ± QRW FRQVLG HUHG WKRXJKW

Open-ended … not every question needs an instant answer.

I W¶V QRW VWXSLGLW\ ,W¶V VXUYLYDO ,Q D society where being unclear is frowned upon, pretending to know is easier than DVNLQJ IRU FODULW\ %HWWHU WR KDYH D VKDN\ RSLQLRQ WKDQ EH DFFXVHG RI EHLQJ FOXHOHVV However, knowing less and being okay with that might actually make us more WKRXJKWIXO QRW OHVV Certainty is seductive, but curiosity is healthier 3V\FKRORJLVWV FDOO WKLV ³HSLVWHPLF KXPLOLW\´ – the ability to recognise the limits of your NQRZOHGJH ,W¶V ZKDW KHOSV XV VWD\ RSHQ DYRLG GRJPD DQG UHVLVW WKH IDOVH FRQ¿GHQFH that makes people shout louder instead of WKLQN GHHSHU 5 esearch shows that people with high epistemic humility are better at collabora tion, less prone to bias and more comfort DEOH QDYLJDWLQJ XQFHUWDLQW\ ,Q VKRUW QRW NQRZLQJ PDNHV XV EHWWHU KXPDQV However, social media thrives on speed, FHUWDLQW\ DQG EROGQHVV We see people online making sweeping VWDWHPHQWV MXVW ¿YH PLQXWHV DIWHU D QHZV VWRU\ EUHDNV :H JHW SHUIRUPDWLYH RXWUDJH LQVWDQW ³WKRXJKW OHDGHUVKLS´ DQG HQGOHVV DQDO\VLV ZLWKRXW WLPH IRU UHÀHFWLRQ 7KH UHVXOW" (YHU\RQH¶V LQ EURDGFDVW PRGH 1RERG\¶V LQ OLVWHQLQJ PRGH $QG LW¶V H[ - KDXVWLQJ What if instead of jumping to conclu VLRQV ZH WRRN D EUHDWK DQG VDLG ³, QHHG WLPH WR XQGHUVWDQG WKLV´" :KDW LI ZH replaced debate with dialogue? What if ³, GRQ¶W NQRZ \HW´ EHFDPH D UHVSHFWDEOH answer? I W GRHVQ¶W PDNH \RX ZHDN ,W PDNHV \RX KRQHVW

³ I don’t know what to say – but I’m here WR OHDUQ ´ Uncertainty creates space for growth, JUDFH DQG IRU EHWWHU TXHVWLRQV :KHQ you stop clinging to the performance of certainty, you realise how much lighter OLIH IHHOV

The space between opinions … sometimes silence holds more wisdom than certainty.”

You don’t need a fully formed opinion on every trend, scandal or headline.