29/07/2025

LYFE TUESDAY | JULY 29, 2025

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Common perceptions about ADHD 0 My child is just lazy, naughty and difficult. If their behaviour does not change despite everyone’s best efforts, the child should be assessed so they can get the targeted support they need. What we see as a behavioural problem may be a medical condition. Their brains are just wired in a different way. The right support will help them to do better in class, at home and anywhere else they are. There are different ways to help them so they can cope, but it starts with an accurate diagnosis. 0 My child will grow out of it. They do not grow out of it – if you do not get help, it gets worse. Undiagnosed, ADHD can lead to more problems. For example, when a child cannot cope in school, they get in trouble, which could lead to disciplinary problems. They get punished a lot, they can go into depression and might even drop out of school. Their potential is cut because they do not get the right support. On the other hand, you can actually manage well and succeed with the right treatment plan. 0 ADHD only affects boys. ADHD can look different in boys and girls. Generally, girls tend to find ways to cope, for example spending extra hours to finish up homework. A girl who spends more hours studying will look like she is coping, but she is actually struggling. But, they may be questioning themselves: “I study so much but I still cannot get it. I feel stupid. Why am I not as good as others?” This mask means that girls often do not get diagnosed, and this can lead to anxiety and depression. 0 All children with ADHD are hyperactive. It depends on the type of ADHD that you have – the hyperactive impulsive type, the inattentive type or a combination of both. The symptoms associated with the types present differently. These are just usual things people need to cope with. There is a scale of mild, moderate and severe cases. If you are in the mild range, you may be able to cope with your difficulties. However, there are those who struggle in many areas, or have other co-morbidities that they need help with. Even with mild cases, an assessment will help you understand how to work with your challenges rather than wonder why you do not function like others do. People have survived without a diagnosis all these years. Why the fuss now? The people who go through their whole childhood, teenage years and adulthood without a diagnosis may function, but are they in a lot of distress? It can affect your career choices, your earning potential and relationships. If they had answers earlier, it would have made a big difference, and they could have lived to their potential.

awareness and understanding of the disorder. Awareness has to be embedded into the school system and the success of a child also depends a lot on the dedication of parents and caregivers to advocate for their children. There is no harm in coming for an assessment. Clinical psychologists are very careful child’s struggles will help child and parent to come up with constructive ways to not just cope on a daily basis, but also to thrive in life. From the outside, we may think that our child is coping. But they could be struggling in silence every day. This article is contributed by IMU University clinical psychologist and senior lecturer Dr Serena In. not to over-diagnose and understanding your

Outside of school, psychological therapy is also essential for addressing related issues such as depression or anxiety. Therapy often involves teaching children coping mechanisms, such as expressing their emotion constructively, as well as manage their behaviours by using timers and reminders which can help a child stay focused. At home, parents can relook at how they organise family life and set up routines and habits such as structured meal times. Ensuring the house is clean, neat and orderly also helps. These are little routines and structures that help everyone, but they are especially beneficial for individuals with ADHD. Next steps Society has come a long way in

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Psychological therapy is essential for addressing related issues such as depression and anxiety.

Learning to say no to a tantrum-throwing child is an important parenting skill. – ALL PICS FROM PEXELS

How to say ‘no’ to your child

Avoid conspicuous consumption Avoid your child becoming an individual who is always trying to keep up with their peers. Just because their friends are having something does not make it good or desirable. So do not fall for the “All my friends have it” ploy by making clear you are not in the slightest bit interested in keeping up with the Joneses. Be it the latest toy fad or watching some online junk on social media platforms, reining in their herd instinct at an early age has obvious benefits. Do not be judged by material possessions Echoing the point above, the ability to comfortably say “no” to a child becomes increasingly significant as they get older. This is when they become more attuned to societal pressures and material desires. It is at this juncture it becomes important that children understand life is not just about accumulating possessions. Life is enriched by experiences, many of which do not come with a price tag.

o Teaching youngins realities of life

Ű BY R. BALA

hearing a lot of it from teachers and supervisors at nurseries, kindergartens and eventually, schools. As a parent, there should be no guilty feeling about saying “no” to a child. Call it prep work for life skills, but the sooner the child accepts that word as being normal in their world, understanding life and its many challenges become a tad easier. Teaching meaning of value The cost-of-living crisis is biting hard into the budget of ordinary Malaysians. This is not the time to be indulging on non-essential items. Kids may not yet understand the economic realities, so try to explain in language that they will comprehend. Illustrate why an expensive toy or going for a fancy dessert does not represent good value. Draw comparisons to highlight that the item being asked for is not the best way to spend your

I T is just two simple alphabets, but it has the potential to cause a meltdown of gigantic proportions in a child. Yes, learning to say “no” to a child is an essential component in parenting skillset. More pertinently, getting a young child to accept hearing that word without throwing a monumental tantrum would be a feather in a parent’s cap. Here is how you can approach it. Erasing feelings of guilt Saying “no” does not equate you to a bad parent. In fact, saying “yes” to everything will mark you as an irresponsible adult, with little or no self-control. It is imperative young children realise the world is not going to yield to their every whim and desire just because they so desire it. Pre-schoolers should get used to that word as they will probably be

hard-earned ringgit. It may not be easy but you will have to put on your best sales person persona to convince your kid you are just not being a cheap skate. No child likes hearing ‘no’ but the faster they learn to accept it, the better their mental well-being.