20/06/2025

FRIDAY | JUNE 20, 2025

10

Courses do not define you, your mindset does E ACH year, thousands of students across Malaysia receive their UPU placement results, marking a mile stone that is often met with a complex COMMENT by Nor Syadza Zamani

LETTERS

letters@thesundaily.com

PUBLIC TRANSPORT is meant to make life easier. Buses, in particular, should offer a safe and affordable way to get around. But do bus drivers truly understand the responsibility they carry? Recently, I had a harrowing experience on my way to the MRT station from home. While waiting by the roadside for a RapidKL bus, I signalled for the driver to stop but he nearly hit me and an elderly woman who was also waiting to board. As the bus approached the stop, the driver swerved dangerously close to us, showing no regard for our safety – it was a terrifying moment. When I finally boarded, I tried to give him the benefit of the doubt, thinking perhaps he had not seen us. But I was wrong. The reckless driving continued. He sped through curves and corners as if he were in a race or a video game. The atmosphere on the bus was tense – everyone looked uneasy but no one said a word. We were all just clinging on, silently hoping to reach our destinations safely. What upset me most was what happened next. An elderly woman who boarded the bus was slowly making her way to the priority seating area with the help of a walking stick. Before she could even sit down, the driver suddenly accelerated, causing her to nearly fall. She was visibly shaken and the incident left everyone on the bus in shock. The driver did not even glance back to check if passengers were safely seated. This kind of behaviour is deeply irresponsible. Reckless driving puts lives at risk. This woman could have been seriously injured. How can bus drivers show such disregard for the safety and well-being of the people they are entrusted to carry? As I sat there, shaken, my thoughts turned to the recent tragedy involving the UPSI students. Fifteen young lives were lost after the driver was allegedly speeding on a winding road. That could have been me or my friends. It is painful to imagine what their families must be going through. What is even more heartbreaking is knowing that nothing changes. Soon, all this will be forgotten until another road crash and more lives lost. Another group of friends laughing on a bus could become tomorrow’s headlines. Another mother could be left waiting for a child who never comes home. Another family could be planning a funeral instead of a celebration – all because of careless drivers and weak enforcement. How many more lives must be lost before we finally wake up? How much more tears must be shed before we realise that this is not just a transport issue but a matter of life and death? I am sharing this because I refuse to remain silent. I will not pretend this is normal because it is not. Public transport should feel safe. Passengers should not have to worry for their lives just to get from one place to another. We need greater awareness, stronger training and stricter rules for bus drivers. Companies must take responsibility for who they hire. And passengers like us must speak up when something feels wrong. I urge the relevant authorities to strengthen enforcement on public transport, especially buses that operate on our roads every day. We don’t want to be another statistic. Bus drivers must be reminded: every time they take the wheel, they are responsible for the lives of everyone on board and everyone around them. Daninas Hezry City University Malaysia Cyberjaya Enforce safety rules – don’t let us become another statistic

mix of emotions. For some, there is excitement and relief. For others, there is confusion, doubt or even quiet disappointment. What makes this period particularly difficult is the pressure to feel certain – about one’s course, one’s future and one’s direction in life. As a lecturer working with foundation students, I often hear the same concern voiced in different ways. “Miss, I don’t know what to choose for my degree. I’m scared I’ll make the wrong choice.” This hesitation does not usually appear in formal academic discussions. It slips out during quiet moments – during consultation or in passing – when students finally feel safe enough to speak honestly. These fears are deeply valid. Behind every university offer lies the weight of expectations – to choose something practical, respectable and fulfilling; to make decisions that won’t disappoint loved ones and to prove oneself ready for adulthood. In reality, very few students at this stage of life feel completely ready. Many are navigating unfamiliar territory, unsure of what they truly enjoy or whether a particular path will lead to long-term success. I understand this uncertainty well because I have lived it. There was a time when I, too, had to choose a degree without being fully sure of what I wanted. I made my decision cautiously, doubting whether it was the right fit but over time, I grew into it. I found meaning in the parts I had not initially chosen with enthusiasm. That experience taught me a crucial lesson – growth often begins where certainty ends. There is a widely held belief that students should pursue their “true passion” – a course that aligns perfectly with interest, future job prospects and personal fulfilment. However, Q: MY elderly mother still lives independently but it is becoming clear that she will soon need help managing her finances and other important matters. My siblings and I want to start preparing for this transition. What steps would you recommend to ensure everything is handled smoothly? Focus on the Family Malaysia: You are wise to begin thinking about this now while your mother is still able to participate in planning for her future. First, make sure she is comfortable sharing personal information and financial information. If not, it may be helpful to involve a neutral third party such as a financial advisor, accountant or attorney to facilitate the necessary discussions. Once you have the go-ahead, work together to get a clear picture of her financial situation. This includes calculating the total value of her assets – savings, investments, real estate and any other holdings. Review her monthly expenses to see if any can be reduced and consider whether there are additional sources of funds, such as the sale of unused property or life insurance policies. Also assess her health coverage. Does she UNDER ONE ROOF

A course does not need to be perfect for it to be meaningful. Sometimes, what initially feels like a detour can lead to discovery. – BERNAMAPIC

second-guessing their UPU placement – know that it is entirely normal to feel this way. Confusion is not a sign of failure; it is a sign that you care about your future. Some people discover what they love at 18, others at 28. There is no standard timeline for clarity. Even if the course you are pursuing now was not your first choice, it still holds value. You may come to enjoy it and learn things that surprise you, and if down the line you choose to pivot, that does not mean time was wasted; it means you grew enough to understand yourself better. As someone still relatively new in academia, I continue to learn and adapt every day. I do not have all the answers but I have come to believe this: we do not need complete certainty to take the next step; we simply need to trust that the version of ourselves making the decision is doing the best it can with what it knows now.

that ideal, while inspiring, can also be misleading. Even those who enter their first-choice programmes may encounter challenges that shake their confidence. Passion alone does not insulate anyone from difficulty; it simply gives us something to hold on to when the learning gets hard. Rather than asking, “Is this the perfect course?”, perhaps a better question is: “Am I willing to grow through this, even when it gets difficult?” A course does not need to be perfect for it to be meaningful. Sometimes, what initially feels like a detour can lead to discovery – of new skills, fresh interests or untapped parts of ourselves. It is also important to remember that our educational paths do not rigidly determine our life trajectory. Many individuals today find themselves working in careers far removed from what they studied. The professional world is changing quickly – skills evolve, industries shift and interdisciplinary roles continue to emerge. What matters is not just the field you enter but the mindset you bring to it. To students currently facing doubt or have sufficient medical insurance? It is also important to determine whether she will be able to maintain her current lifestyle with the resources she has. If investments are a major part of her retirement income and you are not comfortable addressing that area, get referrals from friends and look for a reputable financial advisor with integrity and a good track record. Finally, if you have relationship concerns and challenges associated with this situation, do not hesitate to reach out for support. Our counsellors would be happy to help you navigate the relational aspects of this transition. Q: Our eight-year-old daughter was eager to start gymnastics, so we enrolled her in an eight-week course that cost several hundred ringgit. However, after just two weeks, she is feeling sore and realises it is more challenging than she expected – now she wants to quit. Should we encourage her to stick it out or let her stop? Focus on the Family Malaysia: The best approach will depend on your daughter and her past behaviour. If she has a habit of making enthusiastic false starts but often gives up when things get difficult, it may be valuable for her to see this course through to help build resilience, discipline and a sense of accomplishment. This “reality therapy” will be especially

Let go of the pressure to be sure. Start where you are and allow yourself the grace to grow. NorSyadza Zamani is a chemistry lecturer at the Centre for Foundation Studies in Science, Universiti Malaya. Comments: letters@thesundaily.com Helping ageing parents manage their finances

important if you enrolled her in the classes based on her promise to follow through. In this case, the core issue is keeping to her word and not about the activity or the cost. By encouraging her to persevere, she may not only develop a stronger sense of responsibility but also come to enjoy the challenge and gain confidence from pushing through initial discomfort. If your daughter has shown commitment to other long-term activities but is genuinely unhappy in this one, it may be reasonable to let her withdraw. Ensure the issue is not due to a mismatch with the coach, the programme or being placed in a group that is too advanced. Sometimes, a change in environment – with a more encouraging coach or team – can make all the difference. Regardless of the outcome, avoid criticising her decision. Preserving her self-esteem will be more valuable in the long run than any trophy, and the experience can serve as a meaningful lesson for future commitments. This article is contributed by Focus on the Family Malaysia, a non-profit organisation dedicated to supporting and strengthening the family unit. Join dad and daughter date and make memories that will last a lifetime for you and your daughter (13-19 years). Register now at family.org.my/daddaughter. Comments: letters@thesundaily.com